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pigsrlovely2
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Name: Mimi
Gender: Female
Interests: Remindin' my lil' sis: she'll alwaz b my cutee!Rememberin' that it's not too late to be young n happy.
Occupation: Other
Industry: Accounting
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
7/4/2003
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| It feels so good to join with the Bread of Life Church in Torrance for Mexico missions again =)
For three days, I will help build the second story of the October 3rd Church and reunite with some old friends!
I especially look forward to catching up with a particular pastor's wife (she invited me to attend their wedding, about 4 years ago)... and it's taken me about this long to get back to a place of "readiness" for ministry involvement again. I wonder if they have kids? I wonder if she'll remember me?
Tonight was the planning meeting, and it took a while for some folks to recognize me. Kinda weird, but I don't care. I feel like a new person entering the same environment. They haven't changed but almost everything about me has changed. I just feel happy to be in their midst again. This time, Allen came with me and it was really neat to introduce everyone to all that's transpired in my life, since they last saw me. Really, quite a few of them saw me at my most spiritually/emotionally immature moments and it feels like a testimony of brotherly/sisterly love and acceptance. I hope any past trespasses can be forgiven and I hope I've truly matured... I suppose this upcoming trip will tell =)
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| This semester, I've enrolled in a beginning jazz dance class. I've known, for some time, that there's something magical about dance. Perhaps it's the mixture of rhythm and movement, which allows an outlet for expression that far exceeds written/spoken communication. Sometimes, things just feel so yuck that moping around doesn't quite do it, and rambling on leads to more frustration... during those times, I don't question it.. I just dance =) So far, we've been tested on two dance routines and we're about to learn our third one. I'm looking forward to this next one because it's really elegant, but it's a slower song and so each leg extension will be noticed. I'm having a problem with overall stiffness... I know that it takes years to build flexibility and I'm getting to the point where I see a "flexibility barrier" to my further progress in dance. So I think yoga will be my next focus. After I give that at least a year, perhaps i can return for intermediate jazz with bigger movements! =) | | |
| I'm not sure if this is a "woman thing" or it's just my temperament, but I give of myself way too much sometimes. My mom has warned me about this and she once advised me to use the "one notch lower" rule, which states that I should try my best to always bring down my giving one notch b/c (even then) it is likely to still be more than what the average person would give. That said, I'm finding this super relevant when it comes to these next six months... I've got a tremendous goal ahead of me and just the right amount of time to accomplish it (if I can only reign in my giver-tendencies). It would be a tremendous shame if I were to neglect myself of the time that I need (and am willing) to invest in my studies on account of reverting to the familiar, old ways of giving to any/everyone who manages to pull my heart strings (either in fact or just in my own imagination). After all, giving is a form of lavishness, I suppose.
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| I have been blaming God and choosing to distrust His protection and providence ever since my in-way-over-my-head involvement in a given ministry, exactly 5 years ago. At the time, I chose to enter this ministry (despite my lack of spiritual maturity) as a way to better myself and become more spiritual. After all, it made perfect sense to me that there would be no other place than in the midst of battle to develop warrior discipline (I have since come to see the error in that thinking). So essentially, I set myself up for failure and disappointment by picking up a "power saw" (I tend to give in to my dramatic flair far too often), when a pair of "scissors" would have been more appropriate to my readiness. Rather than facing up to my own responsibility, like this, I have spent the last five years blaming God for allowing me to get into such a mess and distrusting His love and faithfulness, because (I thought) He should have protected me from my own immaturity!
However, as I drove to church yesterday, I was thinking about a food particle that was lodged in my upper right molars and I wondered if I should pick up the habit of flossing again (it's horrible what happens to me when I become immersed in my studies). However, I worried that flossing just might aggravate the very tooth in that region that I suspect has a cavity. I imagined sticking the floss right up alongside that tooth, only to meet unbearable pain. And then I realized how silly I was for even thinking that flossing would be to blame for any pain I might experience. Instead, I should probably blame myself for not flossing more frequently! And that's when it hit me: Just as flossing is less to blame than my lack of flossing, my ministry involvement is less to blame than my lack of maturity. If anything, my ministry involvement may have only elicited that much pain because it was a sure sign that I clearly was not ready. Therefore, the answer is not to avoid ministry (nor is it to blame God), but to strive to grow deeper in my Christian walk to become more mature. And there it was- 5 years of ranting and raving about how I "can't believe that God didn't save me from a horrible situation" basically was obliterated in the same amount of time that it might take to floss!
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| In elementary school, I stopped by for snacks after school. In junior high, I searched for my first set of make-up. In high school, I needed supplies for school projects. In college, I picked up dormitory necessities. In a couple of weeks, it will be empty.  | | |
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